"It taks six men to carry a man to his grave whereas it takes only one woman to put him there."

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A discussion was taking place amongst a group of upper class British. Apparently annoyed with his demeanor a prominent English Lady stated to Winston Churchill,

"Sir, if you were my husband I would put poison in your tea," to which he replied,

"Madam, if I were your husband, I'd drink it!"

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While at another social gathering Sir Winston Churchill became inebriated with alcohol. Due to his overindulgence with the liquor he became a little unruly for the likes of one lady. Because of his drinking she became irritated and upset at his obnoxious behavior and in a fit of rage she declared to him that "He was the most arrogant and intolerable man she had ever met" After her short outburst he calmly replied,

"Ma'am, you are the ugliest woman I have ever met, but tomorrow I'll be sober."